Tips: What to do if you have been cheated

As Valentine is approaching and every one is talking about love. But today I want to write something for my readers who are out there feeling cold even when the season is about love and love is always warm. Sorry to hear that you have been cheated upon but dear one it wasn't your fault. No, it actually wasn't you or anything about you that made them take that decision. They had a chance to choose and remember they chose them. Here are a few tips to change your tragedy to a trophy that will make you a winner.
 1. Let go:


I know it isn't as easy as it may sound. You are trying to hold on to something that has broken down and it is only wounding you more and more as time passed by. Learn to differentiate between being in love and being in love with the idea of love. If you really loved someone you will always want to see them happy. You should also know that you loving someone is totally your choice so it doesn't need a label or a tag of some sort of relationship nor does it need anyone's validation. 

2. Don't play the victim:

It is very common amongst us to keep pitying us or wanting someone to pity us. We keep doing that by repeating and re-repeating the not so happy ending. We keep on satisfying our need to be loved on the alms given to us in form of pity. If you keep doing this all you will end up is attracting more people who will pity you for a while and leave after that. Some of them may even buy you your favorite flowers but even you know that they are just making themselves feel good for giving that attention to someone who was craving the limelight. 

3. You are worthy:


When you are cheated upon all you end up doing is hating almost everything about you.
You are forced to fall down in a pit that is full of insecurities and your fears. You may even see this as an end but dear one end is when you give up and stay in that pit. What you are looking outside of you is actually within you. The love, the happiness, the joy everything is within you. Stop criticizing yourself and  stop doubting your self worth on the basis is someone else's decision. You take charge of how you need to feel. Sometimes people do find a way back to you and dear soul wanting them back be your inner wish but remember you weren't their choice back then. 

4. Trust:

 Dear soul, you are amazing. Please stop denying every little thing that gives happiness to you. Yes, you are afraid I know that. Probably to an extent that it scares you even when people are just being nice. Being cheated upon does that to you. You never can trust people again but isn't it unfair that the one who is supposed to have a guilty conscience is actually out there probably going around with someone who they said were not their type and here who loved and wanted to make it work is so scared to even think of a relationship. How long will you punish yourself for loving? I remember a friend of mine saying "see you got to start trusting like every day you put a little faith upon a driver to drop you somewhere, you don't ask them to show their driving licence every time you board a vehicle" Love is that. You have to trust and only when you do so you reach somewhere even if it isn't your destination. The first step is to at least give it a try. Start trusting yourself. Put a little faith on yourself. First step will definitely be worth it.

5. Manifest: 

Here is what you can do instead of thinking yourself as a victim you can  manifest what you want in your life, your relation and your career. Manifest as in think of what you want rather than what you don't. Think about how you want your life to turn out rather than how it didn't. Focus on making your life better for yourself, for you truly deserve it. Listen to songs that are happy, that give you some sort of inspiration, something that gives you hope rather than the songs that makes you gloomy. For when you are singing you are actually sending that vibrations to the Universe. 
Have you noticed how what you don't want keeps on repeating? This may be signifying that you have passed on too much of information on what you don't want sub consciously. Time to change the pattern of how you think. Focus on what you want, keep repeating it to your sub conscious mind either silently or out loud. You will be amazed to see the difference. 
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Tips: What to do when you feel low?

Hello my lovely readers. Hope you all have been doing good. How has the first month of 2020
turned out for you? For me, it has turned out so much more than expected. From being awarded "The Most Exciting Find 2019" to almost having nothing that excited my soul. I did feel a little lost, but here are certain things that I did in order to get back from a blur moment to focus. To all the readers who are actually going through some hard time and trying to go through it I just want to say "This is your battle and it is you who needs to fight it". Here are a few tips that will help you to fight the battle like it did to me.

1. Believe:

Yes, manifest what you want in your life and believe that you deserve it. Have a clear picture in your head of how you want to see yourself. If sad thoughts keep coming up and hinder your belief; you give your thoughts a red sign. I do that by saying "stop Lochana" that is my red sign to the thoughts that tries to get me down. I also talk opposite at times. For example when I am running late and I had ample of time to get ready previously but I just wasted my time. The thought that usually comes up is that  "I hate you, you are never on time" but what I do is hating myself isn't getting me any faster so I always change the negative thought to positive one by saying "I love you, lets do a little fast now so we can at least make it on time". This has changed a lot of things in me.

2. Talk:

If you know me personally, you definitely know how much I talk until recently I realized I was talking but not saying things. I had kept it in so much that it almost made me stop wanting to feel the the emotions that I denied to feel. So one fine day I call my brother and started telling how I feel. He told me this and that but the best therapy was he just listened without judging what I felt. I then realized that I was afraid of expressing my down moments, my fears, my bad memories, my not so appreciable feelings and over time they were just making me feel heavier. I know myself very well, at least that is what I thought until recently for that one 3-4 hours conversation made me feel like I was just a little girl who was afraid. I thought maybe my choices would make my family embarrassed of me even though I felt those decisions were right according to me. I just had a little baby monster who was feeding on my insecurities and growing bigger every other day. Sometimes we are just petting the wrong feelings within us. Family will always stand by you. They know what you are aspiring to become, they know your changes, they know your choices. We differ and that is what is beautiful about a family. 

3. Accept:

Accepting yourself is so much important. You will instantly realize the difference the moment you put aside what you should be and be what you actually are. I know what it feels like when you have to be someone you are not. Trying to fit in when you know that isn't where you belong. Slowly the fake front that you put will come haunting you back. The best way is accepting how you are, the right people, the right crowd will eventually make their way to you. This is my own personal experience as I am someone you will see as very out going I talk to people but when it comes to fitting in, I don't  even try when I know that isn't the crowd I want to be in and sometimes this leads, me being alone but I enjoy my own company more than being in a crowd where I need to pretend to be what they expect me to be. Accept that this is  a phase and it shall pass. This isn't the end. 

4. Engage yourself:

Empty mind is always doing things that does no good to you. All it does is remind you of things that went wrong some 10 years ago and make you dwell on things that you could have done to change its outcome, well this is just an example but I totally can relate to it. So find yourself something that will keep your mind from opening the closed files. My recent pleasure moment is watching award functions as this also helps me to know how to engage the audience as an anchor. My brother suggested me this vlog Born to Ride Lakhshay Anand and just after watching a few parts I kind of have started liking it. If you have travel bug in you or if you are a bike enthusiast this vlog is  a must visit.  So get something that will help you come back and relax. 

5. Question:

The best way to know what you are lacking is by sitting back and questioning yourself what you want. Deep down, what is it that makes your soul smile. Yes, this may take longer than you think to figure out. At times we know what makes us happy but sometimes or should I say most of the time we are still figuring out what makes us happy from the core. So, go out there try things, collect experiences, be kind and keep growing. You may not be there yet but one fine day You surely will.   

If you have more ways to keep yourself away from feeling low, feel free to tell me.
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Tips: Workplace and You

 Hello everybody. Hope you are doing good. First of all thank you for all the love and messages. It feels amazing to be loved by you. Sorry, I am a little irregular these days, no excuses I just know that I owe apology to my readers. But Life is surprising me. I hope it is doing so to you too. I also know why these changes have come in my life. I wouldn't say everything is destined but a few of them happened because I changed some of my ways. I  know how the environment you work in can actually affect you emotionally. As we are at the end of the year and many of you might be thinking of changing jobs, quitting because you had enough, were not enough appreciated, or it may be any reason. I personally do work at different places and I see the difference in me, myself. Took me long enough to figure out why was it that I liked being somewhere while on the other hand I did not like the other.  It was Me in both the places, what was different was my environment.Trust me, the next Job will still have the same kind of people or worse. Here are a few things that I noticed was affecting me and how I over came it. I hope this will be of a great help to you as well as I was to me.

1. Appreciation:
Yes, appreciation. Here I don't mean that we need to be appreciated like a child, but acknowledged for what ever we do. I have seen a very dedicated person, who never talks ill about someone does his work and also the other's work and never once have I heard him complain but at the end of the year I could see the changes in him, no he did  complain. More like he started giving less than he would. I started observing him and to my surprise I found out it was because his efforts were not acknowledged. So he slowly stopped putting in all the efforts that he used to. It emotionally brought him down as well. Though with God's Words and his right company he bounced back to his emotional stability but the work place lost a very dedicated person. Here when you are going through some similar kind of situation the best way to overcome is by standing for yourself and saying "No" to things that you do not see yourself growing in and about appreciation start doing that for others, for every little deed they do for a huge lesson it was to me that appreciation comes back when you are dedicated to your work. Lets earn it this time.

2. Right Company:
The basic to every work place starts with right company. May be you are new to the job and don't know who to trust and be friends with. Here are a few things that have helped me with adjusting to different work place scenario;
a) See who does not come to you and talk about others, because those who do will end up talking about you too. 
b) See how one deals with someone who makes mistakes, some will blame, stay away from them. For the right ones always helps them correct the mistakes someones makes, guides them and help them grow.
c) Stay away from the jealous ones, they will do everything to pull you down and make your stay hard.
Please note if you do not find people as mentioned above being alone is not bad, you aren't there to make friends. You are there to work. 

3.People:

The hardest thing about a work place is it's people. One grows or breaks depending on how the people of the work place are. When there are people who are old enough but not mature will lead to an environment be filled with negativity. Where new comers and old comers issues starts rising, I have seen many break down at this phase, many stop showing what they are capable of and many just end up being the orders follower. The best way to come out of it, do not only talk to the new ones. if they act immature you be the mature one and break the ice. Be humble and ask how things were done before you came, how they want it done and then explain you have thought of some ideas as well, they might not like it but understand you are here to grow so be productive. You have the bomb of positivity in you, no body can install that in you nor can someone take it away. Stay true to yourself.

4.Trust?

No, I didn't put that question mark by mistake. I know how hard it is when it comes to trust people, specially in your new work place so be careful with what you share not every one is your good friend some just want a juicy topic to talk about. If you end up being one, that will continue for a very long period but one good thing is no matter how late but truth has its way of coming out so do not keep explaining yourself. Just be careful who to share with and what. I too have my personal account as Public but this went a little overboard when my feeds were being discussed in my work place, but this did not bother me for long because they had enough time to sit and talk of what I post online while I did not I was busy doing something productive and my page has nothing that actually needs discussion about.

5.Dating, Oh No:

Work place may sound with having someone who cares for you, brings you little gifts, lightens up your mood when you feel pressurized very happy but the same person could turn into your haunting daydream when you both do not work out. seeing each other may also end up filling the environment with negativity. So just have Crush on them and if you aren't in the above mentioned criteria then do not be it the next one as well that is never I repeat never get into the fights the couple are going through, they may end patching up and totally ignoring your existence. Stay away from the lovers.
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Tips: Emotional stability

Took a  real long time to write this one. As it was one of the most requested post and I couldn't write about something that I didn't it do myself. Not just from reading books on emotional stability but also applying them and seeing how many worked while how many did not. Jumping from one option to another here are a few ones that were of immense help to me. When everyone and everything outside seems dark, negative, sad. It is just gesturing to the feeling we have garnered inside. Apart from having  friends, who can listen to you repeat the same lines almost thousand times, for they know you just need to be heard right now and family who always stand strong for you. Here are a few tips that showed results, I hope it works for you as well.

1. Realize:

We cannot control what people do to us. They will treat us according to their level of understanding of matters but we definitely can control how we react to them when they don't act according to the way we think. We cannot give someone our rigid frame of their identity and tell them who they are. The more we want them to be the way we think is perfect for them we lose our own peace of mind and invite more and more pain. Realize we are different people, born under different signs, raised in a different environment. Changes are inevitable, but when you love and appreciate them, they surely will try to bring the better version of themselves out. It is time we realize we cannot make everybody happy. 

2. Let go:

Today, sit back all by yourself and say "sorry" to yourself. For you know the pain that you are in is because you are the one who is causing all the pain that you are in right now. This pain is much more than that of what people gave you either by hurting you, cheating you, lying to you or abusing you. The pain is because you are not being able to let go, you are still holding on to the memory of the pain. Today and right now please close your eyes and think of everyone who you think was unjust to you, who you think have hurt you and say I forgive you. Let them go from the memory. Everybody had a reason to be there in your life at that moment of time to teach you something. The longer you hold on to the grudges the longer you will be in pain. Forgive them and forgive yourself too. I remember a day when I was walking with my friends holding a balloon as it makes me happy, but some how it slipped from my hand as I looked at it I said I am letting go. Letting go of everything that is making me sad, letting go that is hurting me and I smiled, so genuinely. Try it once I bet it will be of help to you.

3. Accept:

Accept that you are worthy of all the good things and people that you think of. You have to love yourself before you go there and wait for someone to love you. See you cannot wait for someone to come and make you happy. If you cannot make yourself happy trust me there will be no one who can. No matter how hard they try you will not be satisfied. You will be like the empty leaking cup no matter how hard we try we won't be able to fill it. You are an amazing being. You don't have to run after people to show what your worth is. Stop bending so much for people. No matter how much you do for people they will only remember the time you said no, the time you hurt them. Will you only feel beautiful when somebody says you are beautiful?  Will you feel good for that certain moment when you were complimented and feel low about yourself the rest of the time? Why? Why don't you feel comfortable in your own skin? Why do you love yourself by looking through someone else's eyes? Dear one, you are amazing the way you are. Every little thing has a purpose. You are an awesome creation of God why do you keep forgetting there are things only you can do to make this world a better place? You cannot give what you don't have. If there is no love inside you what will you give to others? If you are full and overflowing you can fill the other empty one.

4. Attachments:

It hurts because it mattered at a certain time. We are social beings and we create attachments over time but when they don't work the way we think they should we usually start creating walls, or deep pits thinking to keep our little self safe but unknowingly what we end up doing is just isolating ourselves. We keep our walls so high that even we cannot break it even when we want to. We usually get hurt when we expect the other one to understand, act according our thoughts, read minds but isn't it unfair? You two are two different beings. Instead of dropping hints just let the other one know what you are actually thinking, what you want them to do. Many a times the other has no clue what is even bothering you as different people have different perspectives.

5. Communicate:

Before communicating with someone else sit back and communicate with yourself.
Your likes, your dislikes, where you can adjust where you cannot, what are the boundaries, what is it that you are looking for, what makes you happy, your ideals etc when you don't know yourself well how can you expect someone else to understand you. Instead of making stories about someone in your head, waiting for them to read your mind, go ahead put aside your guards and communicate but also look for the response and decide what is to be done next. 

6. Mental Notes:

This is my personal favorite. We feel low sometimes, we are humans and we have feelings so it is normal  but that doesn't mean you can stay hurt or sad for a week or so. I usually respond my opposite thought to my brain for example if something is irritating me I say this is calming me down and I smile. Even as I am writing this down there is a great chaos going outside my room, dogs barking on top of their voices had it been before I would have already gone out, showed my anger and come back more frustrated but these mental notes that I passed on to my brain these sounds don't bother me as much as it would have. Even the phase of being a teacher has soften me down where I usually would have been angry I just look at the other and think they are way to young to think at my level and I smile even when I have issues with my colleagues I look at them and pass on a mental note saying they are different beings to be thinking like me and out of no where I smile. People will hurt you, they aren't you but if you keep thinking about it day after day who is going to be at loss? My dear it is you. Let them be, forgive them like I already said you have no control over the other, but you can control on how you react. We usually blame the situation, the other person or anything else for justifying our action but reacting to it was your choice, solely yours. At moments at such what is inside us comes out, if it is anger, hatred, negativity or love, compassion, forgiveness. Whenever a situation comes where your inner peace is at stake be strong enough to walk out of it, no matter who is in front.

7. Keep aside fears:

First know that whatever is coming you have your own back, put the faith in yourself before you want someone to put the faith in you. Trust yourself, love yourself, stand for yourself before you want someone else to do it. Imagine how many problems you went through and came out stronger of it. You will always be there for yourself, so don't worry what will the other say, what will the other think sometimes people don't even see you, even if they do what can you do about the thoughts in their head? Nothing, don't be afraid to do what you want to even if there are people saying it otherwise. Go, for it. You never know that might be your true calling. Go face your fears. I know easy said than done but before writing it for you all I actually  went and faced a few of my own fears. Hospital being one of it, but I know now my fear was what was keeping me captive. It has weaken its hold over me.

8. Meditate:

I am still in the learning process but this has helped me a lot. I couldn't keep calm when the thoughts were running wild, but slowly it wasn't about the complete silence rather observing my own thoughts and why trying to understand why were they there. Guided meditation always helps if you are a beginner.

 9. What you eat:

This has affected me a lot. What we eat also has a lot to do with how we feel and who we eat with also  makes a difference. No matter where the food has come from if it is in front of you, send your positive vibration by either saying a short prayer or thanking the ones whose efforts you didn't see.What you take in also affects us in ways we don't see.

10. Books and Music:

Motivational books have actually helped me a lot. A few books were suggested by my friends and all of them were pretty much amazing. Books on healing, books on stability, acceptance, looking at the bright side, managing ones income, and about people who made the most of the wrong situations and came out of  it shining. Soothing music, like the ones we use as background music while meditating can be listened to, to calm you down.
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Tips: Importance of positive self image

The world we live in today has so much of its influence on us. A world where we have to try to fit in, a world that has segregated us in so many levels. Being watched from different corners , judged by strangers and what not. As we move into every new day we become less of a human. Wondering why I said so? Every day you become someone who criticises rather than support, you hate rather than love, you see but you do not observe, you are present yet feel no connection, you are here but not here at the same moment and I can go on.
Now in such a state of crisis we forget to look at ourselves from our own point of view. With both positive and negative aspect of self image, we feed ourselves on the negative ones to an extent that we suffocate and die as a human or end up sharing similarities with the machines.
Here are a few tips on importance of having a self image. 



1. Love: 
You cannot expect somebody to come love you and not do it yourself, all you will end up is with failed relationships. The first person who needs to love you is you. Until and unless you learn to appreciate the way you are, feel comfortable in your own skin, feel that you are unique every little word that comes from the outside is going to shake your faith on yourself when the inside isn't strong.




2. Worth:


You are worth everything, all the battles that you have fought, the unseen scars, the visible mark, every little flaw, all the failures is what has made you what you are today. There will always be someone who will find faults in you, will stand there to criticise, to judge but know there opinion about you isn't going to make any difference in your life but your opinion about you will definitely make a huge impact. 

3. Protective guard:
When you have a positive self image, it automatically works as a protective guard which will keep away all the negativity coming from the outside rather attract more happy people, kind and loving people in his/her life.



4. Influence:
A person who knows his/her own worth will never do something that they don't want somebody to do it to them. They always are a positive influence on themselves as well as the others around them. They always have kind words, appreciation and encouragement for self and the others.


5. Segregate:
 When the world is segregating you in every way possible, you also need to do the same. Segregate what you take into consideration, there are negative words sugar coated in positive ones, there are words that looks ugly on the outside but is really beautiful on the inside, not everything society says is true, not every comment has to be replied. Segregate what you need and move ahead with it leaving the rest where they are supposed to be. Learn to say NO when required. You cannot make everyone happy but it is up to you to keep yourself happy. 
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Tips : Don't know what's next?

Hello, everyone. Wishing my lovely
readers a very happy new year. My today's post will be about us, yes you and me. As we grow we usually come to a situation where we are like; now what, what next?
Trust me I only applied to one institute unlike my friends who had options while I had plans. Graduation-Masters-M-phill- PhD. Well life had other plans. I didnot get into M-phil, I am kind of a person who had planned my life not just professional rather personal too. I exactly knew what I wanted but everything changed over night and suddenly I had no plans. This broke me down to pieces. What scared me more was not having a clue where to begin. My mother, brother, sister-in-law these three pillars stood strong for me almost everytime I went weak. But this became more of my battle with myself.
I totally hate changes but here I didnot even know who I was. So if you are in a phase like this here it is why its totally okay to have no plans.

 1. Experiment:



When we plan, like I did we stick to our comfort zone. Not trying to come out of it. We know what we want and stay satisfied with whatever the outcome is but when we don't know what to do next we usually experiment with everything that comes our way. Sometimes it is so much fruitful than our planned life. This will make you more open to learning. When you are open to learning, you open up an interest in a whole new environment too. Only with experimentation we find what we really need rather than want in our life.

2. Choice:


This phase may look like the dark night not willing to pass but realise it eventually will and it has to. Giving up at this point will only stop you from realising the true potential that you have. Remember some closed doors are to be knocked and some are to be broken. No matter how much people support or they don't, it is you that need to stand strong and have faith in yourself. It may be like a phase where you are stuck in the middle of the ocean in a raft, see you can stay there do nothing and die or make the most of the situation, learn to swim, come to land and win gold in Olympic. Every situation comes only to sharpen you. Now it is upto you how much you can take and what you make of it. You should consider yourself one of the millions going through the same phase not like you are the only one.



 3. Savings: 

Well I know I am old enough to be looking out for myself yet I am being taken care by my brother financially but not everyone can be blessed the way I am so this is where you should learn and also pass the knowledge about importance of saving for the rainy day. I know my brother has struggled enough to keep me safe from all the struggle he endured but the best thing he passed on to me was importance of saving. After this phase there is something better waiting for you and you are only moving forward with an experience. You should know it is never late and you never are too old to start saving.

4. Understanding:

Understand yourself, what you are passionate about. You need not conform to what society wants from you or what your family wants from you if you do all you will be is a sad human who complains about his/her work. When you work for your passion, you never work a day as you enjoy doing what you do. Not having a clear set goals can actually help you reach there. Not every time what we think is right for us is right and sometimes with all the experience you become more adamant about what is right for you and now you also know why.

5. Present moments:

Sometimes with everything planned we forget to live the present moment. For me it started when almost every plans that I had made for my life came crumbling down in front of my eyes that I couldn't put myself  back together and start planning again, to be honest I was too scared to do so. So for the time being I thought I was escaping only to realise that I was more aware of my present environment, of my family's support, my true friends and moments which I was taking granted for a long time.
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Tips: Be the Ideal Couple

Hello everyone, Thank you all for the amazing number of views on my previous post. Welcome back again and today I am going to write about how you can be the ideal couple, the power-packed couple. Though you all know what I write is my personal or someone very close to me and their experiences. So this time it is the lessons I learnt from my super brother and my amazing girlfriend; my sister-in-law. It is personal to me and in times like ours where relationship end and begin at the speed of 4g I hope this will actually help you too to become the ideal couple, the couple who adds on to your beautiful dream of love even more sparks, the kind of couple you would want some advice from on your matters like I do from them. Respect, love, honesty, communication are the keypoints which I have already discussed on my another post so without repeating them which you can find in the following link ( Have a strong relationship ) I want to add on the new ones.

1. Correction is done in private:


We all are humans, and making mistakes are very common but being corrected in front of bunch of people will only being the self esteem of your partner down, at the particular moment and also the next time they see the people in front of whom they were corrected/scolded. So next time come back home and talk about it. Instead of blowing up you can try save her/him in front of the people and tell them what is supposed to be done the next time if such situations arises.

 2. Keep your fights private:


Yes, your fights are your fights. Keep them to yourselves. It is you two who has to come to a convenient solution that works for both of you. Remember you two are two different individuals, just because you love each other doesn't mean you have to be a copy version of them, learn to disagree without the fight. Not everything you know is wrong may be wrong from the other's point of view. When both of you think are correct, let the other one talk first. This will give time for you to think and have a good point of view of their ideas and things get calmer when one of you does the talking rather then both at the same time. If you want to be treated like the ideal couple behave like one in the first place. 

 3. Belittling the other:


When you fight and make your fights public chances arise that you talk a bunch of wrong things about your partner. Yes, you usually consider it normal when you are angry but you make up soon and are in love again but the images that you left behind when you were angry will remain imprinted in your friend's mind leaving them to disrespect you and your partner secretly. Well, if you don't want this to happen don't talk bad about them even when you are angry.

 4. Priorities:

The moment she is yours or he is yours. We slack in putting the efforts that we did when we were pursuing them. But a real couple know that this person means the most and rather then expecting them to understand you show them that they mean everything to you. Just a short message or a call once in a while within the day makes them know that even when you are busy you are making time for them. Love has to be shown, little gestures of coming back home with their favorite flower or may be something that they were wanting for a long time.
You, may think you aren't the kind of partner who shows love but do love so be careful when someone actually comes along and shows your partner love and also does love. Keep them like they are the only one in the whole world and you cannot afford to lose them.

5. Look out for them:


When you truly love this one person, you give in to all their tantrums and still smile because you know the happy they are; the happier you become. Letting the other one be who they are and not forcing your ideas of life on them will bring the real person out in them and with total acceptance comes out true feelings. You are always there looking out for chances trying to make it easier for them. And you get back double what you give and all you want to give them is love. Not every day is going to be great for them be a good listener when they need. Sometimes just listening without being biased solves most of the issue. Help them fulfill their dreams that they have for themselves. Help them with short  term or long term goals. Appreciate the efforts they put in for you. There are times that you will never know when the other one is actually going out of their way for you. 





Relationship is like the tire of bicycle you need to move together in order to reach the destination. Just like we have a common saying you need both hands to clap or else one hand can only do one thing that is slap. You both are writing a story on a page of life in order to turn the page you need to complete writing together or wait for the other to finish writing.
Suggestions and criticism  are always welcomed with an open heart.
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Tips: How to save money

Thinking of saving money? But all you end up is being broke by the last week of  the month? Saving from pocket money can be difficult at times (not everybody is lucky as me) but when you start earning for the first time you usually don't know how to manage the money that is coming in, as complained by most of my working mates. Instead of saving they enter in debt no matter how much they earn owing to the factors that they are usually expected to pay the bills every time, now that they are earning. When it comes to saving the sooner you start the better, it makes you financially stable and that thing earns so much of respect this days, yes I do mean the money thing. I know this took me a little longer to write because I absolutely cannot write something that I haven't tried myself. So basically it was a good start for me. I hope these tips will be helpful to you all too (especially the ones who have requested it). 

 1. Divide and use:
No, not divide and rule rather divide and use. When you get your pocket money, your salary or any mode of income of money, divide it into two parts, going for 50-50 wouldn't be easier at first so go for 70-30. Save the 30 and try to manage within the range of 70. While saving, it would be easier if you have two bank accounts. So that you save in one and use from another. Every month you keep adding little to the saving account and soon you will start seeing the difference.

2. Piggy Bank:
Oh, you are never old for the piggy bank. It surely will come handy when you start collecting your pennies and cash. The bucket is filled by the droplets of water just like the piggy bank will with the coins and when accumulated can actually make a difference. What I am doing is I usually come back with change in my hand after buying something or change from the vehicle fare I put them away in the piggy bank, I would have done something or bought something with the change. Most of the time we do not even know where all the change vanishes, seriously like poof and gone but it is time you know where to put it before it gets lost the next time around. So it doesn't matter to us if we use it or if we save it for the current instance but saving can help you later on.

3. Need versus want:
I have controlled all my binge shopping but yet I find it is taking me longer than expected to control what I want to eat and what I need to eat. The moment you look at those shiny pair of heels that are worth every penny you have but you are sure all they will do is add on some aesthetic to your collection and never be worn, girl that is where you need to say "NO", for that is your want and not your need. Most of the time what we want are not even needed. So question yourself before buying anything, and when I say anything I do include all the items on the sale. Buy it if you need it. Best way could be making the list before heading out to buy items, or wish-listing the products; for many times we want things but wish-listing gives you idea if you need it or not. For if it is not needed you often forget about it after wish-listing it.

4. Extravaganza:
Yes, your first salary it is indeed a party time with family and friends that is fine for once in a while but cutting up small habits like reserving a vehicle rather than sharing, opting for vehicle for walk able distance, Coffee on the go, eating out every day, movies in the movie hall can actually save you a lot. Carrying your home made lunch is not just good for saving money but also for your health. Making your own coffee can save you time as well as money. You don't have to wait for your order to get ready and the best part is you can have it the way you like(well I like it extra dark). Wait for couple of days the movies that you watch paying 300 to 500(including what you eat in there) will be streaming in television or YouTube very soon. I prefer walking to vehicles as they give you some self time, good for health. Ever planned a home party? yes, the next time you are expected to give the treat you can opt for a home party, you will be saving couple of thousands if your gang is big and if they love drinking but make sure you get the permission from the house owner before you plan the party.

5. Motivation:
Having some kind of motivation to save actually helps a lot. When you have a general idea what you want to save for. You put in more efforts towards saving. Next time when you want something don't buy it then and there come home start saving for it. When you actually save up the needed amount you can change the thought or stick to what you were going to buy. Saving for travel has always helped me save money these days.

6. Splitting:
This I learnt the hard way because my brother looks after me and he has kept me financially stable so I pay for what I eat, so to prevent people paying for me I ended paying for them too, like my friends are expected to pay because they earn now. I simply started saying we will split the bill before ordering and a good friend will happily accept. This will save you enough for your another day lunch. 

I promise to add on some more when I figure it out, I welcome all your suggestions on how you save money. Thank you for all the support and the ideas that you want me to work on. I soon will write on it too.

Thankyou #Reader21 for your awesome suggestion of personalised gifts. I soon will give it a try. As she has suggested that catually making a gift for someone can also save money. Though this may save money but what you are investing for example your time and your love is so much more if the reciever sees it. 

Thakyou # Meenakshi for your suggestion of actually buying things online and during sales also helps you to save a couple of hundreds.

 suggestions are always welcome. Do leave a feedback. Thankyou
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