Tips: Mistakes we do when we are in a relationship

6/30/2017 0 Comments A+ a-


When we are in relation we are in each others life, their major decisions, their likes,their dislikes. We are so much into each other that we tend to make mistakes. Mistakes which we do not realize until relation becomes messy.
So here are a few point you need to know and rectify your mistakes on time.

1. Dependency:

Once in a relationship we become dependent on each other so much that we take the other persons effort for granted. Its always good to make each other feel wanted . It is always good to let your male partner know that he is needed, that there are things he can do for you but do not depend on him so much that you make him feel you are worthless . At the same time do not depend on your female partner so much that she feels like you are a loser. There should be healthy dependency on each other to give you a very strong relation.



2. Friend circle:

When you get into relationships the greatest mistakes we commit is we cut off out friends circle. It is always good to have something going apart from the relation. Do not lose your friends.
It is OK to have some boy's time or girl's time. This will keep you both happy and the relation will be happy. The time apart will make you miss each other a little more


3. Space:

Yes, we tend to become like the one we love. We are so much into each other that we hardly have the personal space. If one isn't happy he or she will be unable to put effort as much as she could when he or she is happy and content. This space is very important. It is always OK to have some "ME" time in between the things that are happening. When this happen do not think the other is running away just realize that they need some time for  themselves and you need some for yourself. Learn and enjoy  spending time with yourself too.



4. Not having conversations about dissatisfaction with the partner:

In every relation there comes a time when one isn't satisfied with the decision, doings, talks, or may be not putting effort as much as other. The mistake we do is by not telling our significant other who actually is responsible to bring the required changes rather we talk to everybody about it but not to them. The other doesn't even know whats wrong half of the time. Instead of wasting time in "find out what is wrong game" you can actually talk and sort things out.



5. Romance:

This usually decreases with comfort. Once we are comfortable with our partner we do not usually put effort like we did when we were courting each other. The number of "I Love You" decreases as we expect them to understand. We hardly buy them flowers, chocolates as in the beginning.
We just assume that the other one knows. Relationship becomes stronger over time as romance is kept alive.
Compliment each other frequently.
Flirt with each other.
Surprise them as you used to.
Cook something they love.



6. Taking for granted or being taken granted for:

One of the worst phase of relation is of being taken for granted.  When we aspect them to be enjoying what they did for us rather then seeing the actual effort they put in. It is love to do things for our loved once but it will improve next time when you see the effort one has put into it. May be cooking for you in the morning, if they chose they could have slept a little longer.

Cleaning after you leave. You expect they should do it but can chose not to. That is why respect each effort the other is putting for you. Thank them often. Praise them. Make them happy by liking the things they do for you. In return you can put a little effort by helping  them with what they are doing.if they are doing this for you they will try to put more effort in it. if they are doing it for themselves they will be enthusiastic about it. To be taken for granted is he worst  feeling one can have. It will destroy them from inside and the relation from outside. always value your partner like you did in early phase of love. If not let them go.




7. Expectation:

its a mistake we usually make as we tend to expect so much from our partners unknowingly that we get disheartened  when things do not turn out the way we expect. we can reduce this by actually telling them what we want or what we are looking for . No one is a mind reader the faster you understand this the better for you.






8. Not talking about finance:

This is one of the main aspect you should be talking about. We hide our money problems which later becomes more problematic. Talk to your partner about your loss, raise, debt e.t.c so the other can put in an effort to help you. If not help at least not to be financially depended on you for time being. This honesty will help you in long run in your relationship.



 

Tips: Have a strong relationship

6/29/2017 0 Comments A+ a-

Sometimes we look at couples and get that relationship goals. We wish our relation was as perfect as theirs. Most of the times we don't realize what went wrong that things had to end. If you want your relation to last longer. Have relation people admire of. You should always understand that all relation are different and beautiful in their own way. Here are few  tips you should follow to strengthen your relation. a strong relation always gives relation goals to others. The addition to this version has been given in the following link The Ideal Couple

1. Communication:

No I do not mean hundred messages on Whatsapp, fifty direct messages on Instagram, sharing screenshots. When I say communication I mean the real face to face conversation. Ask how the day passed by for them. If they ate well. Hug them, show affection. Put your words into action. Have an hour a day with no electronic devices. This will help you strengthen your bond with your partner.When you are in long distance relation make sure to have some face time.



2. Trust:

Whether long distance relationship or relation where you meet everyday.This aspect can make your relation or break it. Trust, just five letter words but the core foundation of relation. You both will be at ease when your person trusts you. You will be careful not to do things that will break the trust of your partner. Trust once broken is very hard to earn back. Trust provides healthy space to you and your partner.




3. Realizing that no relation is perfect:

The world has been taken over by the digital age where you know what the other is doing, just with one click.There they are the perfect couples whose social sites are filled with lovely pictures of them having fun.

The reality can be different from what we see. You are looking at a part that they want to show. They don't go all over social sites making announcement of how you fought the other night. How you have been fighting for a decade now.

They highlight the good part whereas others highlight the broken and bad part of their relation. Even the best do have misunderstandings, fights, disagreement for it is obvious that any two individual will have different set of ideas for same thing.
They put their differences behind and brings out their best part to be seen by others


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4. Encouragement:
When you are in a relationship your partner is more emotionally attached to you then others. Therefore your little nudge for them towards the thing they aspire will mean so much. You will help each other grow. You should never discourage them even while joking. He/she will feel hurt to a very long extent.





5. Respect:

One of the very important aspect of a strong relation. Respect is earned not begged for. When you respect your partner that is a greatest form of love you are giving them. You love them but they earn their respect by doing things when they promised to do it, being honest, making time to eat with you, putting equal effort towards the relation as you are and any more .



6. Honesty:

You can create an illusion by lying but when one finds out the truth {apart from surprise party}, they will be hurt.
Your partner will blame themselves and things will go sour but when you are honest things may be problematic but it will cool down soon. As the other thinks you chose to be honest. They will trust you more and respect you more. Be honest about your finance.




These are just a few one to help you.

5 Points: Considering a cat for a pet is great idea.

6/28/2017 0 Comments A+ a-


Sigmund Freud
said "Time spent with cats is never wasted."
Cats are known to be selfish, aloof, self centered . Honestly who doesn't like some "ME" time right.
If you are considering a cat for a pet then you are on the right path to happiness.
Five reason why cats are better.



1. They are independent:

Cats aren't hard to take care of. They can take care of themselves. Even if you are out all day, you will find your cat probably napping when you come back. They are satisfied with the little attention you are able to provide.







2. They are always clean:

Its the strict regime they follow. They lick clean themselves very often. So the burden of giving them baths reduces to once in a while. If your cat is bushy and has long hairs you need to help him clean himself  by combing it.






3. They are easy to train:

Cats do not do potty in the open. So the pain of cleaning after your pet is done vanishes. They are super easy to be trained to use litter boxes. They use their sense of smell and usually do their jobs at the same place. So if your cat has done it outside the boxes you need to use a strong smell to wash it off so that you prevent him from doing it in the wrong place.





4. They do their own exercise:

They stretch every once in a while. They take proper naps. So usually the problem of walking your pet around lessens with the cat. They keep themselves so much entertained that they entertain you too.




5. They are friendly and lovable:

You can leave your child around the cat it will keep the baby busy and wont hurt the baby. They only attack when in threat. They are royal creatures who like to showoff sitting on a window pane




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Tips: Organising a party.

6/27/2017 0 Comments A+ a-


When you are organizing a party you have to be very careful about the followings. if you want your party to be a success



1. Invitation:

 Invite your guest at least two weeks prior to the event so that they do not make any other plans for that day.
If the guest is really important you can consult the date  with them before inviting others.







2. Location:

Keep in mind the types of guest u are receiving as well as the transportation.
Not everybody owns a car and if the location is offside a few  people will turn down your invitation. So have a place that fits these criteria. Book it before hand you don't want your guest to be turned down at the end.


3. Food and Drink:


You cannot miss out the very important factor of party. "THE FOOD" . Know the number of guest who are vegetarian, vegan and non-vegetarian and organize table like wise. Know the age group of your guest and have drinks accordingly. Keep in mind if your guest have children who will tag along make something for them too. If you don't want to waste food call your guest two days before the main event as a reminder and you will also find out those who wont be able to make it. Order like wise.


4. Music:

Chose music very cautiously . The mood of the party is set by the songs you play. Plan your songs according to the type of party you are having.


5. Decoration:

It does matter. You will be taking pictures and a well decorated place will have better pictures than the one without decoration. Some lights, balloons ribbon.




 

Five must haves book on your booklist.

6/27/2017 0 Comments A+ a-

Books have always been my personal favorite friend. Here are five books that i read and re-read . These books have given me a new perspective to think about . Hope it does to you too.




1. You Can Win by Shiv Khera:



This book is one of my spirit lifter. It has made me stronger over time.
If you feel like you have done all you could and are at verge of giving up. Try this book and see the difference in you, your way of thinking, your way of looking at circumstances.



2. The Palace of Illusions by Chitra Banerjee 
Divakaruni:

Well we almost all of us have grew hearing the epic battle of Mahabharata but to know the perspective of Draupadi was thought changing point for me. Go ahead a try this book. You will love it.







3. The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison:

This book made me realize that we grew up being fed on labeled idea of beauty. Everyone is beautiful and one needs to acknowledge it.
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4. Funny Boy by Shyam Selvadurai:

This book has changed my way of thinking towards ones sexuality.
this book is a bildungsroman. You trace the growth of the protagonist from his childhood into the complex world of adult.We can chose to be what we want.
You will love the protagonist when he comes out of closet even if its just for himself.






5. The Color Purple by Alice Walker.

This book teaches to overcome all your problems as the protagonist tries to overcome hers. the book teaches to appreciate what we have around us. teaches one to learn and accept the truth.

Macbeth as a tragedy.

6/26/2017 0 Comments A+ a-

“ A drama dealing with noble protagonist placed in a highly stressful situation that leads to a disastrous, usually fatal conclusion.” Is a tragedy as stated by Charles Boyce in his article named Shakespearean tragedy.

The characteristics of Shakespearean tragedy.
1.There is a tragic hero in the play.
2.Readers pity what befalls the main characters of the play.
3.A tragedy has to have five acts.
4.Death awaits the main characters in the end.
5.Protagonist  has a tragic flaw.
6.Protagonist has a high degree of importance.
7.Downfall that is disastrous to the main characters.

Macbeth follows the characteristics of the Shakespearean tragedy. The format is as below.

1. High degree of importance:
 
The protagonist has to be of political importance. As Macbeth is both the Thane of Glamis and Thane of Cawdor. The King himself speaks highly of Macbeth honoring his efforts in the civil war. “oh valiant cousin worthy gentlemen” (A-i S-ii L-28). He is respected by the people of Scotland. As the play progresses becomes more important figure, the King himself.

2. Military leader:

An important part of a tragedy is taken from the idea that an entire nation is affected by the decision made by the tragic hero.

3. Hamartia:

It is the major flaw that is known as tragic flaw. The flaw which leads to the downfall. In Macbeth: it is his vaulting ambition that leads to his downfall. He himself recognizes his flaw, the unpleasant trait in him before killing Duncan “but only vaulting ambition” . It is his ambition that changes him from an honorable man he once was. His ambition grows more as he becomes King. He realizes according to the prophecies that Banquo and his son shall stand as a threat for him so he orders to get them killed.

4. Hubris:


It is the mistake the tragic hero makes caused by his excessive pride. Macbeth after listening to the prophesies from the three witches of him becoming the next King tries every possible thing even if it is killing the existing King Duncan. Blaming his murder on sleeping  guards and Duncan's sons who have fled for their life. Making him the King. He confuses with the prophesies made by the witches after he becomes the king leading to increased vanity in him and the prophesies deceives him at the end.

5. Catharsis.

It is the realization of his mistakes made by the tragic hero. Macbeth realizes the double meaning of the prophesies "None born of woman shall harm Macbeth " but Macduff was untimely ripped from his mother's womb. This terror for his own tragic ending leads the audience to pity his character and fear his death

6. Nemesis.

It is the divine judgement for Macbeth for all his crimes he has committed against the people of Scotland, King Duncan, Macduff and his family , those guards as Macduff kills Macbeth and makes the right heir Malcolm the King.